Rock
Scissors
Fuck
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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