Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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