so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
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