I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is this the sara with the beer cane?
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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