good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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