Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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