Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
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