weddingsv make me drug and hornr
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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