K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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