You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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