Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have started to decorate penises.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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