Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize