So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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