69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize