nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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