I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
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He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
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I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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