butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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