He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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