You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
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So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
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Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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