He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
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Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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