So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Also, beer. Big fan.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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