i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize