my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I just googled if crying burns calories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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