my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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