Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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