The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize