apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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