Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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