yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize