My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm passing your future prison.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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