I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
You may now shotgun with the bride
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
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