someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Randomize