absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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