Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Randomize