There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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