in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize