today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
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I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I am one with the molecules
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I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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