I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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