I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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