plz talk dirty to me
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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