Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize