I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone stole a lamp last night.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize