Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more Irish car bombs ever.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize