yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize