I wish you could order shots online.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I need moral support for this bender
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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