roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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