he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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