My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
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I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
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