She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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