I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize